“Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious – the best not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse.” (The Message)
It gets pretty easy to concentrate on the negative, doesn’t it? The 2 year old is throwing temper tantrums now, I want a cupcake and can’t have it, The Marine is working the most horrific hours you can imagine, life as a non-custodial mother is always filled with stressors, we’re face triple digit heat indices in early June, and I don’t want to hand wash dishes again because the dishwasher can’t apparently be repaired by incompetent maintenance workers in this complex. And don’t even get me STARTED on this complex.
But, every day, Rhyan learns a new word. Three days ago it was guitar, two days ago she recited the noises that 10 different animals make, and last night Daddy taught her to say, “Stop shooting stupid”. (And then threatened to take her to the live fire range today so she could let the Marines know who was smarter.)
I can’t have a cupcake, but the cravings are subsiding, and I’m finding substitutes. And a cupcake would just cause a large baby, a risk for c-section, insulin dependency, and many other yucky things I want to stay away from. So, I’m thankful for the willpower I’ve been given this go ’round.
The Marine is working horrific hours. Monday was a great example – he was peddling his bike to work before 0200, and didn’t get home until 1700, after having been on a live fire range with moronic students all day long. But, guess what? He came home that night. The sunburn is a bit difficult to withstand, but it’s not 140 in the shade, like he has experienced time and time again in combat zones. At night, I can still hear him breathing next to me.
Being a non-custodial mother has its up and downs, and its very easy to focus on the downs, especially when their father does something that upsets me. But, the 15 minute online chat I had with my oldest yesterday was precious and filled with blessings and reminded me to cherish the moments, once again.
The heat is tolerable, and even more enjoyable to me than cold winters in the arctic tundra (also known as Michigan). I am happy to be sweating rather than shivering and to be able to feel a cool ocean breeze on my face. I did feel it yesterday – you have to stand in the shadow of one of the taller hotels on the boardwalk and not move a muscle, and you will feel a slight cooling breeze for about two seconds!
I can’t really look at this complex very positively, but at least I have a roof over my head when so many others have none. My basic needs are met.
And, at least I learned how to hand wash dishes when I was very young. But Mom, I don’t care what you say – they ARE going to air dry.
Think positively! It will change your moments today!